Confession No. 75 — Stop! Right now! (Please?)
I have a fairly thick skin.
Fine. So I don’t, really. But, I’ve learned through the years to move on, or at least keep my trap shut. Sometimes, though, I forget to take my meds.
Pajamas are for bedtime
This could just be a Texas thing. Or, it could be isolated to my hometown. People out in public wearing their pajama bottoms.
I took this photo on the down low, hence the blur. Aren’t they a cute couple?
And I’m not talking about those stretchy blue jean/pajama combos sold on infomercials.
I remember, as a child, occasionally seeing old ladies out and about with curlers in their hair. I don’t remember the circumstances. It could’ve been that they were buying something at the five & dime while the perm — done at the beauty shop next door — was chemically burning their follicles. Maybe they were just out for a smoke.
Or, they might have been the grandmothers of the current-day sleaze queens who don everything from Betty Boop imprints to camouflage. Publicly!
I could understand someone wearing jammies at 2 a.m. at the drugstore. Heck, I’ve been known to go through the Whataburger drive through around midnight in my bathrobe. But, for crying out loud, I didn’t get out of the car!
There are no redeeming style qualities when it comes to a pair of oversized nylon pants with an elastic waist. Wearing them for mid-day grocery shopping or a trip to the movies is proof of bad taste, laziness or a serious meth habit. Or, all of the above.
For goodness’ sake, put on a real pair of pants!
Cell phone loud-talkers
Can you believe that I encountered a cellphone loud-talker about 10 minutes after I photographed ‘pajama couple?’ I honestly believed that those morons had learned a little couth over the past few years, as I rarely encounter them these days.
As I was pushing my cart beyond the discounted Glade Christmas candle display, this pot-bellied guy wearing jeans, sneakers and a T-shirt took a left turn in front of me as he said ‘Well, you could make me dinner…’
It was then that I noticed a cell phone plastered to his ear.
Seriously, man? It’s bad enough that half of the grocery store knows some of his personal business, but I truly think I overheard some loser trying to play his version of hardball with a lady friend. What do you want to bet that he also drives a Hummer and has a doctored photo of himself on his Facebook profile?
I only wish I’d paid attention to the groceries that he was (undoubtedly) going to pay for with a sports-themed credit card.
No more dirty laundry
At the risk of offending some of my readers … Hell, who am I kidding? I’ve never cared about offending anyone. Especially when I’m trying to save them from themselves. Here’s the deal: Please quit telling us through social media when you’ve walked out on your spouse, or have had a run-in with your in-laws.
First, if you are my friend, call me. You can even send me an email. But to broadcast your dirty laundry — even in code — on Facebook is just … pathetic. Save some pride and keep your personal business personal.
On a related note, my children do not know whom I voted for in November. Oh, they’ve asked. But, I consider my political beliefs to be mine. That’s why you’ll never see anything in these pages about my favorite (or least favorite) politician, gun laws or any other political hot-button issue.
For starters, I don’t know a single person whose opinion has been changed by what he’s read on a blog. Secondly, most people don’t really care about my beliefs. But they do occasionally care enough about political rants to block me — or at least to look at me like I looked at the beautiful ‘pajama couple,’ or that cretin on his cell phone.
So, why bother? Just stop instead. Please?
If you like what you read here, please help me spread the word. I’d also love for you to join me on Facebook (click the ‘like’ button) and Pinterest.
I was raised eating mostly pork tenderloin or boneless shoulder that had been seasoned lightly and roasted. Dad would make delicious gravy with the drippings. I still occasionally have a hankering for that. But I also like a pork roast that will compliment several additional meals. The following recipe fits that bill very well. We ate from it the first time on New Year’s Day with fried cabbage, cream peas (saved from summer) and pasta. A couple days later, we pulled a portion of it for delicious tacos. Then, the bone served as the pork seasoning in a healthy filling pot of Six-Bean Soup. In case you are are tired of redux meals, just know that Carribbean-style Roasted Pork Shoulder is head & shoulders above the standard holiday turkey.
Caribbean-style Roasted Pork Shoulder
Caribbean-style Roasted Pork Shoulder is tender, succulent and perfect for a redux, or two.
1 – 9-11 lb. Bone-in, skin-on pork shoulder
Freshly ground black pepper
1 medium – Onion, sliced (put in pan with pork roast, discard after cooking)
Marinade
1 cup orange juice
½ cup red wine vinegar
⅓ cup dark brown sugar
¼ cup kosher salt
2 TB. olive oil
2 TB dried oregano
2 TB – Chile powder
2 TB. ground cumin
2 tsp – Ground coriander seed
1/4 cup – Cilantro leaves and stems, chopped finely
10 cloves garlic, minced
Mix marinade ingredients in a bowl; set marinade aside. Using a sharp knife, cut several 1-inch-deep slits all over pork in a glass or ceramic roasting pan. Generously sprinkle black pepper over top (skin side) of roast. Pour marinade over pork. Chill, turning pork every few hours, for at least 6 hours.
Preheat oven to 325°F.
Place onions in roasting pan around pork. Roast pork, basting with marinade every 30 minutes, until an instant-read thermometer inserted into thickest part reads 160° F, about 6 hours. Let rest before serving.
Serves 5, with plenty of leftovers.
OR taking your children to school in pajamas and house shoes. seriously?!? Think of your children people. lol The pork looks fabulous!
Thanks, Tara!
great blog, love your writing -
Thank you, Beth. I love yours as well. (Just checked out your musings and you have a new follower.)
You know I’ll be trying this!
Let me know what you think of it.
All I can say about today’s rant is: “Here, here!”
I don’t know if you get those emails w/all those horrific Walmart shopper photos, but the one you posted is quite tame against some of those! I don’t even open them anymore–I prefer to believe the myth that the human race has a chance of obtaining some semblance of intelligence (evidenced by self-awareness) some day . . .
So long as there are Honey Boo Boos (and parents of Honey Boo Boos) in the world, we’re doomed. Glad you stopped by and hope all is well on the farm.
Hey Adam, I love you dearly, and I agree with all your peeves!!
Melina
You were one of my ‘parents,’ so is it any surprise? I appreciate you.
For the love of all that is pure and good in this world, can’t we all just agree that the pajama bottom couple are adorable. Oh wait, that wasn’t what I meant. Can’t we just agree that the pajama bottom couple could have been a LOT worse if Mr. Jama Bottom had his pants falling to the ground and was bearing his Scooby Doo boxers? There.. .that’s what I MEANT to say. Oh, and I also meant to say, pork rules the world and YOUR version should be in my belly very soon! <3
Of course they were adorable! I wouldn’t post anything less in these pages. lol. And, with all due respect to my fellow Tribe members, you are correct. Puerco es muy bueno.
Another great post. I am in total agreement with you again. Adding recipe to my growing pork recipe collection!
Thank you, Betsy. You are a Southerner … What are your thoughts on dinner guests offering to help with the dishes? (I cut that portion from today’s essay.)
Oh boy, that is a loaded question! For a true dinner party (not a cookout, etc.) I would say, “the dishes wait until later” – for all of us, including myself. It is rude for a host to leave guests to their own devices at a party. Now if a guest insists on helping there not much one can do… Actually in that case THEY are the ones being rude…According to my mother, if one offers to help in some way (or give something to someone) and are refused one can offer once more but if still refused – accept it, don’t keep badgering, that is rude. When dealing with Southerners I will always offer to help, but fully expect to be refused… unless it is family! Then they will want me to take the trash out and scrub the bath tub too! Ha-ha!
OK. Good answer. Thank you. I’d written in my draft that someone with good manners will always offer (well, unless it’s a black tie affair, or something like that). But, I added that a host with good manners will always refuse the help. — With family, all bets are off.
Exactly!
love the recipe! I have to tell you though. About your rant. These things happen here in Canada too! Especially the pajama bottoms and cell phone! ugh.
Oh my, Jackie. The pajama thing is everywhere. I think I might despise it more than the wanna-be gangbangers who wear their oversized pants just below their asses.
oh now, I wouldn’t go that far. At least with the pajamas we don’t see underwear, hmmm, they ARE wearing underwear I hope………
Eeeek… Let’s hope so.
The grocery store is always the best place to watch for pet peeves. It’s like a treasure chest of dysfunction.
Also, I’d kill for some of that pig.
Jen – C’mon up. There’s plenty left. Bring your family. I’ll feed them too.
OK, I can ignore the jammies…the cell phone blabbers get a nasty stare…but the dirty laundry airing, politics and religion, dang, now that’s the stopping point…let’s just keep FB a Mr. Rogers happy land as far as I’m concerned!! Love your waste not/want not and stock tips, too…part of my cycle of life growing up w/a depression erra mother…yes, I still save aluminum foil reusing a few times and glass jars, which, btw, are chic now! You’re the cutest snob I know!! xo ally
It is my goal, Ally, that you will no longer be able to ignore the pajama people after reading this post. The cell phone guy caught me off guard and he was in a zone. — As for saving, reusing and repurposing.. It just makes sense. As always, thank you for stopping by!
And thank you for not putting any “hot topic” beliefs on the blog – it is so refreshing to know I am safe reading it! AND I love your recipes – well I am a Texan after all!
Sure thing, Connie. I mean, I get serious occasionally. But, if someone wants to read about ‘fiscal cliffs’ or health care, well.. There are plenty of appropriate places for that type of material.
I am still scarred emotionally from the times my mother picked up carpool in her curlers. Traumatizing, I tell you! That roast is porcine poetry.
Did Mom use those pink curlers with the foam rollers? Or was she more old school with the hard plastic ones with little spikes on them? lol
It’s not just in your city or state. We saw folks in their flannel pj bottoms in the Walmart parking lot recently (we were driving through, not going in). Regarding that last bit, a-friggen-men. I’ve blocked or unfriended several people because the political and personal stream just wouldn’t stop.
Anyhow, the pork looks fantastic. Hubby walked by as I was perusing the ingredient list and he agrees. I think it might end up on the menu soon. Thanks for sharing!
I’ve unfriended a few … and lost respect for others. Once in a while, I might post something ultra-personal. But, at least I can blame the Scotch.
Just ‘driving through’ huh?
It can be a fun Sunday afternoon people watching at the local Walmart. More shocking than most of those slasher movies and sometimes as grotesque!
I love a good pork roast and I’ll have to try your marinade.
Thank you, Sir!
And all this time I thought those awful public pajamas were just a Memphis thing! Great post, Adam. Your blog brings me great joy with every entry. Happy new year.
Thank you, Jenny! I’ve discovered, through comments here, that this pajama thing is (at least) a North American thing. What’s up with it? I mean, why?
Let me just say right off the bat that the pork shoulder looks awesome!! I can smell it and I want it!!!! Thanks for sharing this!!!! Pajamas in public – please and no thank you!!! When I was in Houston a while back my nephew was leaving the house at 3 pm and I yelled out – Certainly you’re not going out in your pajamas. Needless to say, he ignored me, but don’t all 18 year olds.
Cell phones should not be allowed in public places – period! Dirty laundry on your blogs (let’s include personal health issues like digestive problems on a food blog) – please, we all have personal problems and opinions about everything and anything – and that’s why they are called personal. Please keep it that way!!! So – ditto, ditto, ditto and well said! Of course I guess one could say that I just expressed my personal opinion about pajamas, cell phones and dirty laundry. Oh well. 
Thank you for your kind words.
And, let’s not confuse opinions with continuous ranting. Politics is a unique beast. I choose not to even tell my children whom I’ve voted for. Furthermore, I believe that my local school board and city council affect me a hell of a lot more than the person in the oval office. And, again, who give’s a rat’s furry behind about who Adam supports in a political race? So, why bother? — I admit to having a couple of friends with whom I play devil’s advocate on some political issues. The big difference is that we have an understanding. I share absolutely NO understanding, however, with anyone about their personal business (regarding public posts). I mean, if you caught your husband cheating, shame on him! And, like you said, if you spent all night in the bathroom because of some bad fish … Well, as a juvenile guy, I think that’s sort of funny. But, you are seriously spot on when you say please keep it personal. 
Agree! Personal ranting from you (and others) is definitely acceptable! It makes me smile, so continue on.
When my son was in Kindergarten, my husband picked him up in his old, ratty, fugitive- looking, yard-work clothes…he plainly told my husband, “You embarrassed me!” And dad never arrived to pick him up after school that way again!! Lesson learned!
When I substituted in a high school last spring for 8 weeks…not only were the high school kids (mostly girls, of course!) in their pajama bottoms, but they felt that since they were…it was ok to sleep through school, too!! You are what you wear???? LAZY!!!
Geez.. And the school allowed pajama-bottoms..
Ahhh…the generation of no dress codes…though better than what some of them wear when they do dress up!! Bare midriffs, off the shoulder tops, tight and short skirts…and the guys pants falling down!
I’m teaching at a Christian school now with uniforms…so my eyeballs are not constantly popping out with what I see! Ha!
Happy New Year!! I love your blog!!
Thank you for your kind words. I work for a public school district and we also have a uniform dress code.
Ahhh…we are spoiled to the (UGH!) real world of teen age “lazy-dressing”), and older folks who should know better!
My version of lazy dressing as a teen was wearing a T-shirt. Times have changed. I guess they always do.
You were such a rebel, huh???
Got any opinions on Spandex for anyone heavier than 98 lbs.???
Or older than ten???? I don’t get the “one size fits all” theory!!
Umm.. Have you been talking to my wife about my XXXL-sized Spandex collection?
Yes, I loved talking to your wife!! That’s why I asked! You really crack me up!!
I really need to talk to her about Southern scruples. She’s a NY girl. She doesn’t get it.
Ahhh…now I KNOW why I like her!! We East coast girls think alike!! You are a smart (opinionated) man…and chose well!! Maybe not about the Spandex…but about the wife, for sure!!
The pajama thing kills me… especially when it’s girls who are wearing make-up, have you caught that one yet? You did your make-up, we know you had time this morning. Why not just throw on a pair of pants?
Please don’t tell me this is some sort of style trend.
Hear HEAR! or is it here here? The first time I saw a group of teenage girls in Einstein Bagels in pajamas and fuzzy slippers before they were heading to school I nearly fell into the display of cream cheese. And now it’s spread to young adults. I have several pet peeves over how people dress in public, but that’s the biggest. How about cell phones in the check out lane at grocery stores? Where they’re trying to pay and talk on the phone at the same time. It’s a huge clog and it makes me want to scream and stab them with a fork.
And don’t get me started on the stuff people share on Facebook.
That pork roast must be made in my kitchen very soon. Fabulous.
First time to your blog. Great post.
First, Lea Ann, thank you for stopping by. I hope you stick around — and bring some of your friends. ‘Hear, hear’ usually appears after a quote expressing an opinion with which the author agrees, according to Grammarist.com. However, ‘here, here’ also makes sense in some situations and could very well end up in a usage dictionary in the years to come.
Let’s just hope those young ladies were being initiated into the Zonta Club that day.
And, thanks for your kind words about the roasted pork shoulder.
Agreed agreed agreed! I have one more. I am a teacher at a Catholic elementary school. Moms picking up their children in hooker shoes and low-cut tops. Really?????
Love your blog!
Hold on! I didn’t say anything about hooker shoes and low-cut tops.
Just kidding! Sounds trashy … especially for someone who’d pay for their kid to go to Catholic school. Glad you love this place!
I found out, a few years ago, professors were allowing students to wear their jammies to classes before noon. Really???? Wow. And now you see them everywhere – lazy people in their jammies, bedroom slippers, telling all the world their news and business while they yap on a cell. How public, like a frog. To tell your name the livelong day, to an admiring bog. or, to quote my little mama: oh, the things you see when you don’t have your crap loaded bazooka with you.
Hehehehe.. I think I like your ‘little mama.’
I could eat this anytime but I try not to get caught outside in public in my jamas even when I’m in the Caribbean. Did you get that photo while at a Wal-Mart?
That is a Kroger photo, believe it or not.
I’m ashamed to admit that when I was in high school, i regularly wore pyjamas to school. I chalk it up to youth idiocy. Now, I side-eye and eye-roll any moron I see walking around in public like that because there really is no excuse. These people need “What Not to Wear” stat (or a slap up the back of the head…but that technically constitutes assault). This pork – stunning! Wish I could grab a hunk out of my screen right now.
Trinidadian here, don’t forget your Walker’s Jerk Seasoning!
I’ll have to look for that. Thanks for stopping by!
Amazing, I couldn’t find a single ‘argument’ worth having in your text — you and I are in total agreement! The pork roast looks wonderful and for sure lots of leftovers for two people. Can you buy a pork shoulder smaller – say in the 5-6 lb. range or would I need to have a dinner party if I decided to try this as is?
Thanks for stopping by, Mom. You can use a smaller roast. Obviously, you won’t have to cook it as long and you can cut the marinade in half, or not. — And I would never argue with my mother. That would be rude of me.
Oh boy. I have to admit I’ve gone out of the house once or twice in PJ pants. BUT, it was dark out, I was walking the dogs, and I knew I wouldn’t see anyone. And as I avoid Walmart like the plague I don’t have any excuse to wear the pj pants outside.
It’s fine walking the dog in the dark with PJs. (I’ve taken out the trash in less than that — but it was dark.) If you were to go to WalMart, I hope you’d at least capture some better photos than what I was able to do.
I don’t want to break my camera.
We are on the same page with the pajamas (especially half-tucked into Ugg boots) AND the pork roast (see my latest post!).
I wear jammies all the time at home, I have pink panther ones on as I type. Yesterday was my horsey “roll in the hay” ones. I would wear them out in public if it was socially acceptable but it’s not. I usually take the time to change even if it’s 5:30 am and I’m just driving my daughter to work 5 minutes away. You never know when the car could break down and you’ll be walking home in jammies and bed-head. Loud talkers annoy me. So do couples fighting in public. Or people who stop to chat in Costco who block both sides of the aisles. Or people who pull out of their driveways to let their spouse in and hold up traffic for their own convenience. Or folks who leave coffee cups anywhere and everywhere. Which while I’m on the subject does anyone really need to bring coffee to the grocery store or mall? It’s just sad. If you do then throw the cup away, don’t leave it on the store shelves like a redneck. Okay I think I’m done. Oh, no one more. Neighbours who have a squeaky playset for 5 freaking years, I’m thinking “seriously dudes WD-40 is like cheap and quick”. I may hop the fence and do it for them. Whew that felt good. See Adam, I swear we’re twins separated at birth. Which is why I have to ask why you’re torturing me with pork right now. Man I love the stuff but it does not like me back. This one looks worth the sacrifice. Yum.
Wow, Kim! We might well have been separated at birth! Back to your grocery store coffee-left-on-the-shelf complaint … Does it also chap your hide when you are on the baking goods aisle and find — amongst the flour — that some idiot stick has decided that he didn’t want the supersized package of bologna? That sort of thing really bothers me. And, no… That’s not why the store employs stock boys. Just sayin’…
I have been in retail hell for 2 months and just came up for air…and when browsing my WP reader, your post is the first I read. I was not disappointed. I only leave the house in jammies to walk the dog when he has to make one last deposit late in the evening; I’m with ya on the rest. I am a big pig skin eater, and you just got my mouth watering with this one. I am also happy to know that Whataburger is alive and well in Texas…it was my favorite emergency food way back when I lived in San Antonio briefly in another life;-)
You are very kind to read my craziness and to say such a nice thing. Whataburger is, indeed, alive and well. There is still no chain — regional or otherwise — that touches them with a 10-foot-pole.
Eff yes. Please continue your offensive brainwashing of the innocent of blogland! Great work!
Gracias!
Those pyjamas have hit a nerve! We get them here too – college girls walking to lectures or shops in designer pyjamas and ugg boots. But only if they are designer pyjamas. At shopping centres, the uniform is cheap tracksuit pants or expensive gym gear I think.
Ugg boots are a whole different story. Our 14-year-old daughter wanted a pair. So, we took her shopping. $200 for what amounted to foam soles and crocheted uppers. Ridiculous.
Ouch! When I went through my ugh boots phase, my mum found a pair of fakes at some warehouse, for maybe $20. Gotta love frugal first generation migrants / Chinese parents …
I’m loving your parents for sure.
I’ve made boneless pork loin and of course pork chops before but have never done a shoulder roast but now you’ve taken the mystery out of what to do with one. That marinade sounds awesome so it’s on my list for sure.
I don’t know how that couple got down there so fast because I saw them just the other day in my CVS only she was wearing her fuzzy slippers which definitely made the entire outfit. Now I was caught outside in my pj’s (and very unfortunately they were some old kinda skimpy ones from Niki – hey it was hot that night). Talk about embarrassing – home alone, 11:00 pm when I saw the cat outside & ran out to grab him when the dog jumped up on the back door locking me out. It was either break a window or take a chance & run across the street to the neighbor who has my spare key. Of course I flatten myself up against the side of the house, ran the bell & yelled “DO NOT turn the lights on! I’m not dressed!!!”. Of course he turned the light on, and granted he is very hard of hearing, but still…
As for cell phones – you think it would be okay for my husband to call me from the grocery store to ask me if the zucchini is the green thing or the yellow thing? He’s very quick & to the point and we don’t get personal.
I don’t believe that any rational person (particularly men) will ever complain about seeing a woman in public dressed in skimpy PJs. And, for everyone’s information, I’m a rational guy. As for calling from the store to ask ‘Del Monte? or Green Giant?’… I’m guilty.
Pork shoulder (my wife calls it a ‘fresh ham’) is really my favorite big cut of pork. Nine times out of ten, we roast it with merely salt and pepper, with a little garlic and onion. Whatever you do, leave the skin on!
Well as for the pj’s Adam, let’s just say I’m of an age where it’s not something I should be caught doing. But seriously, this is a true story…I was in the Stop & Shop late one night when I caught something strange out of the corner of my eye. Obviously a bunch of other male shoppers were catching the same ‘thing’ because they were knocking over mid-aisle displays & crashing into things. When I checked out & turned around to empty my basket there was a seriously voluptuous woman with a hand basket & all she was wearing was a sheer (yes, completely see thru) shirt. Oh, high heels but I don’t think the guys were looking at those.
Skin on – got it & thank you.
All kidding aside, Diane, I don’t think there is an appropriate age (above 2) for wearing PJs out and about. I have absolutely no problem staring at women who dress like the one you describe — and usually, they know I’m doing it. But I’m usually staring out of disgust, as I’m thanking my lucky stars that she’s not with me.
I am in total agreement there but have to admit when I got home & told my husband about the ‘lady in the night’ (of the evening?) he had a sudden craving for ice cream so I had to take his car key away from him.
I’ll vote for no pj’s if you’ll vote for my pet peeve – those idiotic pants hanging down below the butt, especially when worn w/a ball cap that’s turned sidewalks & a slitty-eyed look at anyone who dares to look at them. Shouldn’t there be a law?
Hi Adam, I have nominated you for the Inspiring Blogger Award because I think you deserve a little something for making your blog so much fun to read and honest! To share this little bit of blogging kindness: 1. Display the award image on your blog. 2. Link back to the person who nominated you. 3. State 7 things about yourself. 4. Nominate 15 other bloggers and link to their sites. 5. Notify the bloggers that they have been nominated and link to the post. Thank you for inspiring me!
http://tartinemaple.com/2013/01/08/inspiring-blogger-award/
Thank you, Valentine, for the honor!
Oh boy, did you hit a nerve with me today about the pajamas and cell phones. I have noticed a trend the past few years where women (Mainly although I have seen several men) wearing pajamas and shopping and bringing there kids to school in the morning. I might understand once or twice being late and not having time. But there is a gal in Ohio that “EVERY” morning and even most afternoons she is in her pajamas and to make matters worse ( like they could get any worse) they are the same ones. Either that or she bought the pajamas in bulk. And I do not want to hear your conversation in the store. And if they look at you and make eye contact they act outraged that you are listening. Some talk so loud they don’t even need to use the darn phone. Okay, now I feel better and I am so going to try the recipe. Thanks for allowing me to vent. ……winking ; ).
Here’s the thing, Shirley. If they are outraged that I am listening, they can go pound sand. And the woman wearing PJs everywhere — the same pair, no less? I mean, if she’s homeless, I can understand. But what you describe sounds more like the pathetic lazy behavior of someone crashing after a night of smoking battery acid and sudafed.
Oh Adam, my grandmother would have patted your cheek approvingly and pronounced you a darling man (high praise from her) for being down on pyjama-clad day stalkers and cellphone screechers, let alone being able to cook a good piece of pork properly.
What a wonder you are! Love your blog
xx
Thank you! Any time grandmothers approve — everyone approves! (And that makes me feel good!)